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How to Find Out if a Friend is Gay

Someone on Quora asked, “How can you find out if a friend is gay?” I’m assuming the question was because the writer would like to become involved with a potentially gay friend, but was afraid of consequences if his guess was wrong.

Here’s what I wrote:

You might ask something like, “Are you offended by gay people?” or “What do you think about the LGBTQ movement?” The answers should be interesting. Keep in mind that some gay and bi people are so closeted that they’ll pretend to be offended, maybe even say disparaging remarks.

If that scares you, try asking about a gay character in film or on TV, like Kurt Hummel of Glee. Like, “Did you see Glee? What did you think of Rachel Berry (a straight person)? How about Finn Hudson (also straight)? How about Kurt Hummel (gay)?” If all you get is generic responses, you could go a step further, “Did Kurt being gay bother you?”

I think you can take it from there!

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